Low Stress a Top Priority? Take the Pressure Off With These Tips From a Wedding Pro.

When envisioning your ideal wedding, one of the most important things to consider is how you want to feel on your wedding day, and also in the months, weeks, and days leading up to it.

Let’s face it, planning and executing a wedding is no small undertaking. But it is possible to have a straight-forward, breathe-easy kind of wedding experience. And there are real, tangible ways to make that happen.

Here are a few big ones to consider.

  1. Skip (or modify) the Traditional Wedding Party

Yes. You can actually skip the whole bridesmaid and groomsman thing. There is no rule that says you have to have a wedding party, and you might be surprised at how many folks are either opting out of the tradition or creating their own version.

Having a full wedding party can create quite a bit of extra stress, particularly for the bride. In the age of Instagram and Pinterest, the possibilities are endless. This tends to create pressure to outfit the wedding party with the picture perfect ensemble making for a good deal of back and forth for the bride and her bridesmaids. If you prefer to have a wedding party, make your life easier by going with a “dress theme” rather than trying to find a specific dress to accommodate the style, shape, and price point of each person in your bridal party. This can be a huge stress reliever. It can also reduce the impact in the case of the unexpected body change, like your bridesmaid announcing she is pregnant! Yeah, this happens a lot!

Another point to consider is wedding day hair and make-up. Think about this: take the number of bridesmaids (plus moms and grandmas) and multiply it by two (for hair and makeup). That number represents the number of hair and make-up appointments you’ll need to squeeze into the morning of your wedding day. This can mean 8am hair appointments that stretch all the way up to ceremony time. Make sure you think about this when planning how you want to spend your day. 

The role of the wedding party has changed over time. The duties that were once a big part of the honor can now easily be outweighed by the additional effort (not to mention cost) of coordinating a full wedding party. 

There has never been more permission to break form and do your own thing. There are other ways to include and honor the special people in your life. It’s your wedding. Get creative!

photos by Julie Wilhite

2. Cut-Out the Extras

What do you get when you take all of the best ideas out there and funnel them into perfectly curated categories? Have you been on Pinterest lately? Like I said before, the possibilities are endless. It might be tempting to say “yes” to every opportunity for creative expression that comes your way. But hear me when I say, you are so much better off choosing one or two projects that are meaningful to you, and cutting out the rest. When it comes to saving time, energy, and resources, here are a few wedding “extras” that your wedding can be perfectly charming and wonderful without. 

Wedding Welcome Bags - Admittedly one of my favorite wedding DIY trends, the hotel welcome bag can be such a fun and creative way to welcome your guests to town and show them how much you appreciate them being there. And, let’s be real, who doesn’t love a goodie bag? But here’s a couple of things you’ll want to keep in mind: 

  • Creating a personally curated gift bag can be a major project to take on. Between designing and ordering printed materials and gathering all of the items to go inside, the bags can quickly become a pretty big investment. 

  • Because welcome bags have become so popular and have a tendency to create logistical challenges for staff, hotels have actually started charging a fee to deliver welcome bags to guest rooms. This fee can run you anywhere from $3-$10 per bag! Take it from the girl who is usually the one to deliver armloads of bags to a hotel, it’s a whole thing. 

Ceremony Programs - Do you really need them? In some cases, maybe. I suppose if you’ve planned a ceremony that calls for guests to follow along. Or if you have special guests you wish to honor, they might be nice to have. But for the most part, people know what’s going on at a wedding. Presumably, they know who you are and they know why they are there. The rest should be pretty easy to figure out.

  • One exception is if you are expecting guests to sit outside without shade, especially if it’s summer! A simple 5x7 card stock program is perfect for blocking the sun, or fanning the sweat off your brow!

Welcome Signs (and other signage)- Who knew there were so many fun and clever ways to direct the flow of traffic at your wedding? Thanks again, Pinterest! When it comes to signage, think function over form. Signs should be informative. Otherwise, they are just one more item to manage.

3. The Weekend Extravaganza

Here’s something I tell my clients all the time: You’re getting married. Please don’t feel like you have to entertain your guests for the entire weekend. The “Wedding Weekend” has become increasingly common in the last 4-5 years. There is this feeling that, since everyone is coming in for your wedding, you need to go the extra mile to make it worth their while. This is especially true if you are a people pleaser, and also if you just really want to show off some of your favorite spots around town.

The typical wedding weekend starts with a welcome party, followed by rehearsal dinner, then the wedding itself, and finally next-day brunch. I was certainly guilty of this for my own wedding… and regretted it. I was exhausted by the time I arrived at the ceremony and was literally drinking coffee at the reception. It was just too much.

Remember that it is truly an honor, in itself, for people to witness your special event. And as an added bonus, they get to enjoy a beautiful evening of food, beverage, and entertainment. There are plenty of tools out there that your guests can use to figure out where to eat and what to do when they come to town. Seriously, you shouldn’t feel like it’s up to you to entertain or be their travel guide. 

If it’s important to you to create a weekend of events, you really should think about recruiting help from either a professional planner, or at the very least a couple of dedicated friends willing to help coordinate and execute the flow of events. 

4.  Have a Weather Plan

Does the ceremony you dream of take place under the ambient light of a Texas sunset? Maybe the glimmer of cafe lights strung carefully under a night sky is all it takes to set your heart aglow. Mother Nature certainly makes for some of the most memorable scenes and occasions. After all, the elements are what gives an outdoor wedding its magic and whimsy.

Unfortunately, weather isn’t always predictable. It’s actually pretty rare in central Texas for the forecast to call for, say, 100 percent chance of rain all weekend. It’s more likely for us to see something along the lines of a 30 percent chance of rain that tends to switch days each time you check your weather app. 

Nothing is more stressful than a chance of rain when your venue doesn’t have space to accommodate an indoor back-up plan. You don’t want to find yourself in a situation where you’re obsessing over the weather and checking the 10-day forecast five times a day until the day of your wedding. I’ve seen people break-down into major tears over the forecast, others embrace it for what it is and make the best of the moment!

photos by Leeann Funk | Venue Laguna Gloria

If you know the weather is something that could throw you off your A-game, you really should consider booking a venue that offers a tight rain plan. When there is literally nothing you can do about the forecast, the one thing you can have is a great plan.

Your wedding day is one you’ll remember forever. Do yourself a favor and make it as stress-free as possible. You will be so glad you did!

XO,

ren

Ren Newey